Wonderwall
by Pyro the Phoenix
Summary: I can't love you because you don't love me back.


"Masaomi."

It's a whisper, warm breath against his ear.

Mikado shifts behind him, pushing closer, wrapping those thin arms around his waist.

"Masaomi, I love you."

Kida tenses, he doesn't want to hear those words _but he does._

"... No you don't."

The words tumble out, spilling past his lips. Mikado's grip tightens, his breath still breezing past Kida's ear.

"… why don't you believe me, Masaomi?"

A million things whirl around Kida's mind, reasons why. _Because you like Anri, because we're both guys, because I don't know if I love you too, because I'm lost, I'm pathetic, you can't love me,__** I can't love you—**_

"… I don't love you back."

The warmth of Mikado's breath leaves his ear, moving to ghost over his neck. Mikado mumbles into his skin.

"That's okay, I still love you."

His throat feels tight, like he's choking, but there's nothing there.

"… y-you don't."

Mikado's hands move, lightly trailing up Kida's shirt, pressure so light Kida thinks for a moment he might be imagining it.

"I love you, Masaomi."

Kida turns abruptly in Mikado's arms, only to be pushed to the ground by the slightly smaller boy. Mikado crawls on top of him, settling on Kida's stomach. His hands bury themselves in the folds of Kida's shirt.

"I love you," Mikado leans down to rest his forehead on Kida's, blue eyes boring into brown, "Why don't you believe me, Masaomi?"

Kida wants to break their eye contact; it's un-nerving, Mikado's stare. It's blank, unreadable, yet Kida can't stop looking, searching for some kind of hint—

"… b-because… you c-can't. You can't."

Those blank blue eyes move, breaking their gaze. Mikado gently lowers further, shifts to place his head next to Kida's ear, _"Why?"_

The hands gripping Kida loosen slightly, before flattening against his chest. There's a light touch against Kida's neck, fluttering, fleeting. Maybe he's imagining things again—

"I'm not… y-you can't… I'm too pathetic— " _A girl lying in a pool of blood, a sickening crack, __**she might never walk again,**_ "I can't protect you, I don't know if I can _love you, Mikado._"

_I was suppose to love her but I didn't—_

There's definitely a touch, a kiss, pressing warm against his neck. Mikado mouths something into Kida's skin _I love you._ The hands upon his chest start to move, tenderly caressing the expanse of Kida's chest, sliding down to brush over his ribs.

"… You don't need to protect me, and you don't need to love me. I'll still love you…" Mikado burrows his face in Kida's skin, his nose touching behind Kida's ear, "_I love you_."

He feels like he's choking again, throat tingling uncomfortably. Mikado's hands work their way under Masaomi's shirt, touches quiet and fleeting, it's like it's _not real._

"… I don't believe you," Kida's hands place themselves on Mikado's small shoulders, and sit; not quite grasping or pushing, just resting, "You don't… you don't l-love me, Mikado."

Suddenly all Kida can see is blue, Mikado's face hovering over his. Their lips are touching, but it's not really a kiss. When Mikado speaks it's like the words are being carved into his mouth.

"I love you, and _you love me too._"

Masaomi tries to shake his head, but Mikado presses hard against his mouth. There's no more denying the hot pressure of Mikado's lips anymore, fingers digging into his skin, marking, it's all so real—

"If it's not true, if you don't believe me, _prove it_." The words are muffled and rough, but they echo in Kida's head. Mikado presses harder,

"**Stop me.**"

They both stop moving and Kida stares into Mikado, still searching for something. He can distinctly feel Mikado now; fingers digging into his skin, thin legs straddling him, mouth hard against his own,

Masaomi doesn't say anything.

The unreadable, but _beautiful_, blue eyes narrow knowingly. The pressure lightens slightly on Kida's mouth, and he feels Mikado smirk. The smiling lips part,

"_I love you._"

Kida doesn't know why, but suddenly he's the one smashing his mouth against Mikado, their teeth clicking painfully against each other. But it doesn't matter because Mikado's tongue slips into his mouth, and it's addicting, wonderfully distracting. Their hands frenzy and Kida loses track of who's touching where and as they tumble around the floor of Mikado's apartment, Mikado whispers into his ear, his skin, his mouth,

I love you

I love you

I love you

I love you

**I love you**


End file.
